Every time I get another catalog from shooting and gun suppliers I see this silly zombie crap. It’s like some new trendy fad that seems to have become seriously popular. To whom I don’t know, but it is really taking off. Zombie ammo. Zombie targets. Zombie accessories. Even Zombie model guns! Why? The whole theory is explained in Wikipedia rather benignly as a reference to the zombie movies and the breakdown of human society by the undead, but the movement underway to use it to sell weapons has driven me to look further into what exactly is being implied. Where are these alleged zombies supposed to originate and why will they be coming after me and my stuff? Who are the zombies and where are they residing right now, as the climate adjusts to release them from their slumber? What will eventually trigger their attacks and how will we really be able to see who they are? Burning questions indeed, but before I tie them to what I’m sure you see coming, let me offer a potential alternative. Recently I received a comment from an obviously overly religious woman concerning the real apocalypse where the bible reveals the return of Christ and the removal of his fans. She warns that when He returns, he will leave folks like me behind as he gathers up all the true believers (including niggers). What remains will be left to fend for themselves among the armies of zombie unbeliever atheists. I call bullshit on that theory simply because at that point, we would all have to be zombies and survival would be futile.
What I profess to be at the core of this new zombie apocalypse scare is a metaphor for what would likely be who will be coming for my stuff when the ultimate shit hits the fan scenario unfolds: The nigger. What will be coming to steal our food and supplies when the store shelves are all empty? Niggers. What is too shortsighted to stock up on supplies when the end approaches? Niggers. So logically, what will be clamoring at your door in search of free provisions? Niggers of course. And who will be responsible for the triggering of such a dire event? The one nigger we all have come to know in our now defunct White House: The HNIC. Whether he is reelected or defeated, the zombies (niggers) will react. If he wins, the economy tanks and we are all in for rampant zombie attacks. If he loses, the zombies will become incensed and riot and seek vengeance from those of us who are not zombies. The Wiki definition allows for the zombies to infect humans and turn them into zombies as well…Can you say interbreeding?
Maybe some of my observations are elaborate conspiracy theories taken too far, but my simple assertion here summed up in one brief sentence is this: Zombies are a metaphor for niggers and when we release the niggers, we will find ourselves at war with the zombies. How much of a difference it will make what type of ammunition we use or what color the grips are on our pistols seems moot, but it appears to be selling. I wonder what the niggers think zombies are!